“The most destructive of passions—it is a leading cause of homicide—and the least studied, it is, like all emotions, born of necessity, with roots deep in our evolutionary past. Its purpose: to help maintain intimate relationships...” Psychology Today
"The paradox of jealousy is that we all want some of it," says Stosny. It's a measure of commitment. "In small doses it's an expression of caring. Jealousy is like a way of testing whether it's safe to invest more emotion. It's safe when a person cares enough to be uncomfortable. Jealousy is a fear of losing something you perceive you have—the affection, the fidelity of another person. The threat of losing it is a test of how much you value it.”
can be as exciting as it can be debilitating. Jealousy is, however, not love; it’s the fear and anger of losing out or being abandoned. Its basic premise is fear and insecurity. Envy and Jealousy are often thought to be the same emotion. They are not, although they can go side by side. And what a mix that can be. Envy, however unpleasant, usually doesn’t contain a sense of betrayal and resultant outrage and Jealousy does not need to contain an acute sense of inferiority.
|wanting what one does not have,||keeping what one has,|
|a reaction to lacking something,||a reaction to the threat of losing something,|
| is a two-person situation|
If your best friend buys that something you’ve had your eye on, you want to be happy for them, instead you feel bitter envy
|is a three-person situation,|
i.e. in lovers' triangles: or sibling rivalry: fear of losing parental love
|Wanting what someone else has and resenting them for having it.||you think someone’s trying to take what’s yours.|
My work is in no way a self help site nor is it here to give advice or help in any form or way. I am not a psychologist nor therapist, but simply exploring the darker side of the human psyche and attempting to understand basic human emotions and interactions that can reek havoc in all our lives.